Pissgrave is so filthy they give us the musical version of having intimate relations with a sex doll you've found underneath a bridge.

Some lovely Gregorian chant meets us as we load up Halo: Combat Evolved's title menu screen, wait, it's Häxkapell's Om Jordens Blod Och Urgravens Grepp (Of earth's blood and the grave's grasp). It’s a title as catchy in English as it is in Swedish.

Here is the latest offering from everyone’s annoying Step-Father’s second favourite prog band, obviously behind the immortal Rush (F Neil Peart): Dream Theater, a band that is as brilliant as it is pretentious.

So, let’s pour a glass of fine scotch, think of the Highlands and let the Northern winds tickle our balls through our tartan kilts.